im unsure
i feel uncomfortable and very weary

i feel .. like an outsider to say the least
i feel like i'll never be good enough
i feel sick of this feeling

argh it doesn't make sense
i don't know whats going through my head at the moment
but i don't feel like i normally do
its almost as if everything has shifted

i keep trying
trying to force myself to feel a particular way but it just gets so hard sometimes
definitely a clash of personalities
will it be this way forever?
obviously this is my burden, one that i must carry
so i ask that you please help me
please help lessen this burden
help it become easier
all the little things that happen just build up
maybe things will change
if i just hold on..
what kills me is that you will never know
i could never say anything
all i can do is to keep it to myself
that way, i won't hurt you
i refuse to be one of those people
i can't ask for you to be on my side .. not this time
i have to endure this on my own


sometimes i just wish it was just you and me
no other complications
but thats not the way life is